Stupid little things that bug you

[Johnny Mars Bar]

People who criticise people who can't use self checkouts

People who criticise people who criticise people who can’t use self checkouts.

 

[give it to gordon]

When defending a corner, the corner is taken and the keeper shouts 'AWAY'. What does he think his team mates are going to do ?

 

[bluebc]

When a keeper makes a great save and knows he has instead of embracing the adulation he’ll find a defender to berate regardless to make it look like it’s all in a days work

 

[Keeper!]

When a keeper makes a great save and knows he has instead of embracing the adulation he’ll find a defender to berate regardless to make it look like it’s all in a days work

Never the Keepers fault

 

[Stephen230]

When defending a corner, the corner is taken and the keeper shouts 'AWAY'. What does he think his team mates are going to do ?

It does serve a purpose. A defender wants to know as soon as possible if the ‘keeper is coming for the ball and switch to ‘blocking his man’ mode rather than preparing to attack the ball. An early shout of ‘away’ let’s him know he’s not coming for it.

 

[Deleted member 77198]

When defending a corner, the corner is taken and the keeper shouts 'AWAY'. What does he think his team mates are going to do ?

Another one with goalkeepers is when they make a save and then get overexcited and start shouting at everyone. Shut the fuck up and get back in net.

Never see Ederson overreacting like that.

 

[J.G.Blue.]

My mate who I work with now and again on building work always says when we are working up scaffolding "Carefull now we dont want any accidents"
I always have to reply with added sarcasm "Oh sorry mate, I thought today was the day we wanted a Fuc#ing accident!"
I wouldnt mind but he is the one who keeps falling off things, he fell of some scaffold a couple of years back & hit his face on one of the scaffold poles, cost him about £1000 at the dentists & improved his looks no end :-)

 

[Hayley Croppers chopper]

People who can’t use self checkouts.

There’s always one confused doddery old fossil who’s there trying to scrape their 5ps from their purse and put them in one by one.

I was in Tesco yesterday at a self checkout. 7 out of 12 lights were on signalling help from the staff was required. Ours was on because I was buying beer. The poor lady was on her own and ran ragged.

 

[Kinkladze's crazy skills]

Out of control Space Hoppers.

Space Hoppers are dangerous...

Just ask Ivan Dobsky, he spent a long time in prison, until two nice men called D an A cleared him.

"Hi I'm Ivan Dobsky, I'm the Meatsafe Murderer... only, I never done it! I only said I done it so they wouldn't give me another Jalfrezi enema!"



His best friend before prison was Mr. Hoppy, who was inside with him.




But unbeknownst to Ivan, it was Mr. Hoppy who murdered everyone in the first place...
and Mr. Hoppy wanted to return to prison, so Mr.Hoppy framed Ivan again, chaos everywhere!!!



Moral of the story, never trust a Space Hopper.

 

[Kinkladze's crazy skills]

Stupid little yappy dogs who never stop yapping away at everyone and everything.

Cunts

Marty in Shameless had the right idea, removing the voice box of his mum's dog.