The "let's talk" thread

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Bill, 14 Nov 2019.

  1. TINY

    TINY

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    Only this. It sounds like a super scary, crappy, not for me thing to do. But these people are amazing and can help you see things in a way you could never do on your own. Seriously, give them a ring pal. Could be the very thing you’re looking for
     
    StrangewaysHereWeCome likes this.
  2. BlueMoonRisin'

    BlueMoonRisin'

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    Hi mate, sorry you're down, here to help and lend an ear.

    As others have suggested, I think you need to get all the weight of stress off your chest and quell your demons with professional counselling. Just been reading back a PMs between us in 2013(after you had it shite) and I can see this is a particularly raw time of year for you. Seems to me like you have underlying problems you cannot shift. I have myself and appreciate help and advice other have offered.

    Here's an offer. You say you have no social life. Tell you what I'll meet you for a few scoops. If I can't cheer you up and get you laughing I'll pay for all your drinks. Blind drunk I don't do anymore, I'm not going there, horrible desolate place I once frequented too often.... Merry drunk is fine amongst friends and laughter socially: )

    I'm here to help mate, others are too. Please don't suffer alone.
     
    Magicpole, macky, wattle and 5 others like this.
  3. Bill

    Bill

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    Top post
    Top man.
     
  4. BlueMoonRisin'

    BlueMoonRisin'

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    Thanks Bill, and thanks for starting this thread. Hope you're as well as you can be pal : )
     
  5. StrangewaysHereWeCome

    StrangewaysHereWeCome

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    I want to thank you's for your replies, I can't help but agree with the suggestion of talking to my GP, I guess I'd best get registered with one, been down here best part of two years now!
    @BlueMoonRisin' I had forgotten the pm exchange we had had back then! I haven't been back to read them but you've reminded me and I remember some of how supportive I found that then. Nice one, again. I'll keep my eyes open for a BM meetup and try and get over for one.
    Spoke openly about what happened the other day to my gaffer and he's been more than sound.
    Thanks again people.
     
  6. Paying for all his booze? Definitely:-)
     
  7. BLUEYESTU

    BLUEYESTU

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    I posted on here a few months back when I was really struggling with debts, marriage problems, my dads poor health etc and I was incredibly grateful and touched by the messages I got from people. One person even offered to lend me money which totally blew me away as he’s a complete stranger.
    The new year is coming and things are a little better financially, but my marriage and impending death of my dad are beyond my control it seems. I’ve started seeing a CBT therapist twice a month and it really does help, but sadly waiting lists are ridiculous in some places on the NHS.
    One thing though which I would love to change if I could is I really don’t have any friends that I can just meet up with and talk to. My one good friend is a dipper and lives over that way and we don’t get together much. So if there are any blues out there in the Lancaster area who fancy watching a game in the pub sometime then drop me a pm ok?

    To those who have posted on here recently and in the past I wish you the very best for the new year and hope you get the help and support you need. There really is some good help out there whether it’s a decent gp who takes the time to listen, or even the Samaritans (they’ve got me through some very dark times).
    We should never have to suffer alone, and asking for help really is the first step.
     
  8. Prestwich_Blue

    Prestwich_Blue

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    Really interesting and moving article about former City COO Chris Bird here: https://www.businesscloud.co.uk/news/son-of-harold-shipman-victim-opens-up-about-depression

    Never realised his mother was one of Shipman's victims. He talks about the feeling of guilt when you think you could and should have done things differently, which might have saved someone's life. He feels that if he'd gone to be with his mother when Shipman saw her, she might have still been alive. It's something I recognise only too well from my own experience.

    30 years last year, we suffered the neo-natal death of what would have been our second child. Because of issues with the first one, which ended up as an emergency section, the consultant (not the same one as the first pregnancy) agreed that a section would be carried out. I understood that was the accepted best practice in these cases. A few days before the due date, my wife got what seemed to be labour pains so into hospital she went. She wasn't in labour but they kept her in nad, in that period, the consultant decided they were going to try for an induced delivery. His senior registrar tried to explain the history but he didn't listen. Due to that, and the failure to monitor the process effectively, the baby got into distress and had to be delivered by emergency section. The damage had been done however and she died the following day. Over 30 years on, I'm still tortured by the thought that I should have insisted that he followed the original plan to deliver the baby via a planned section. But we assumed he knew what he was doing.

    I really wanted to drag the cunt of a consultant and everyone else involved through the courts, not because it would have changed anything for us (other than maybe closure in some way) but because it might have helped somene else in the future. I still get upset when I see similar cases to ours, sometimes where the child survived but with severe brain and other organ damage and sometimes where it didn't survive. I still think, if we'd been a bit firmer and faced the long, drawn-out process of bringing the case, however hard and wearing it would have been, that one or more of these kids might have had a chance of life.
     
  9. peoffrey

    peoffrey

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    I’m up in Manchester soon-ish for a visit. Happy to see anyone for beer / food if they need a mate. I’m a good listener and can usually deal with other people’s problems more than my own.

    On a side note, I’m in touch with my closest and oldest friend of all time again after he disappeared. The crap he’s been through. Childhood neglect, alcoholism, drug addiction, abuse, depression, self harm. His mum had five kids from five different fathers and he never knew who his dad was. He’s left Manchester and moved to the Midlands. Can’t wait to see him. I trust that lad with my life.
     
    BLUEYESTU likes this.
  10. BLUEYESTU

    BLUEYESTU

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    That post makes me want to live in Manchester :-)
    Seriously though, I hope it goes great with your friend. Relationships like that are priceless!
     

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