Top Tip: if your missus asks is this dress nice,don’t say

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Magicpole, 22 May 2019.

  1. the plasterer

    the plasterer

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    Plastering a home near you
    Jammy fucker, when I’m in the dog house it’s for fuckin weeks not hours, lol
     
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  2. Magicpole

    Magicpole

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    Oh I won’t be out of the hate zone for quite some time.
     
  3. BlueMoonRisin'

    BlueMoonRisin'

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    Don't be afraid to tell her if she's put a bit of suet on MP. And If her arse is as saggy as a taxi drivers seat, she needs telling; )
     
  4. LeeJay

    LeeJay

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    You know that thing when you say 'what's the matter?'

    And the lady of the house says 'Nothing!'

    But she says it in a way that really says, there is something that is the matter, yes. Of course there is. And you should know what it is without having to ask. Without me telling you. And if i have to tell you, it will make that thing ten times worse. So, go sort it out.....!

    That's where i am at the moment. Trying to figure out how many paragraphs she got into just one word.

    I feel your pain, bro.
     
    remember arthur mann likes this.
  5. Barcon

    Barcon

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    Amateur.
     
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  6. purplenose

    purplenose

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    Have done with it, kip on the sofa and when she asks why you didnt come to bed say that there wasnt enough room before presenting her with a packet of ryvita and a tub of light cottage cheese with pineapple.
     
  7. big phil

    big phil

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    Guilty as charged here too MP

    Saying “it looked better on the hanger” is a sure fire one way ticket to the spare bedroom :)
     
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  8. Magicpole

    Magicpole

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    I nearly choked on my coffee. :)
     
  9. Magicpole

    Magicpole

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    It’s a fucking minefield. :)
     
  10. KS55

    KS55

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    "Does my bum look big in this?"
    "Enormous"
    "Thank you, Darling" *
    BOOM *
    *Delete as appropriate.
     

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