I was steaming on Saturday with it being my birthday. I was supposed to be going out with the lady for a meal at night, but ended up having a few cans at mine and then a trip to the pub with a few mates in the early afternoon. My mates were egging me on to stay out for a bit and buying all manner of shots, which I downed and stayed out a little longer than planned.
She was ringing and I was ignoring it and thinking I'd be fine by the time she turned up at mine. Well I wasn't.
Instead of saying that I was too pissed to go out I remember mentioning me likening her body to Homer Simpson's face (her tits were like his eyes, belly button like his mouth, etc). She stormed out of my house, almost smashing the door as she slammed it, and I've not heard from her since... and my mates had left the pub by the time I'd semi-sobered up and ventured back out.
Ah well, we beat Blackpool the day after.