I need some girl advice

[Didsbury Dave]

I've only read your first post ono but, honestly, you need to run a mile.

The relationship is dead. She's dishonest and is playing the field.

She's making a bit of a mug our of both of you to be honest. Probably enjoys male attention.

It's harsh but true. This is from a happily married man who had dozens of relationships. People don't change.

Keep your dignity. Walk away. No good can ever come from a situation like this. If it didn't work once, it won't work twice.

 

[ono]

I'm going to ride this out until 21st November.

We'll have been together for 2 years then, if we were still together. The thing is, we have split up, but aside from that, nothing has changed. We still go out, text, see each other on a night, have sex, watch City etc.

So in that respect, even though we're not technically together, she knows what would happen if she strayed and i know what she'd do if i did the same thing, even though it technically wouldn't be cheating.

My mate knows the deal. I'm 100% sure he isn't even attemtping to nob her. I was more bothered about how it looks, and from this thread i can figure out it looks and sounds a whole lot worse than it actually is.

We've talked about getting back together, but she wants to wait until the 21st November. She's a girl, girls are weird like that. This girl is even weirder than most in that way.

So yeah, 21st November and if there's nothing doing after that, then i'll probably take Dave's advice and run for the hills. Well, jog.

 

[tonea2003]

I'm going to ride this out until 21st November.

We'll have been together for 2 years then, if we were still together. The thing is, we have split up, but aside from that, nothing has changed. We still go out, text, see each other on a night, have sex, watch City etc.

So in that respect, even though we're not technically together, she knows what would happen if she strayed and i know what she'd do if i did the same thing, even though it technically wouldn't be cheating.

My mate knows the deal. I'm 100% sure he isn't even attemtping to nob her. I was more bothered about how it looks, and from this thread i can figure out it looks and sounds a whole lot worse than it actually is.

We've talked about getting back together, but she wants to wait until the 21st November. She's a girl, girls are weird like that. This girl is even weirder than most in that way.

So yeah, 21st November and if there's nothing doing after that, then i'll probably take Dave's advice and run for the hills. Well, jog.

the mere fact you have brought this to the forum shows an element of mistrust.
there is only one way this can go i'm afraid.
you have already said you have "split up" so there is no cheating but you feel it would, too covienient for her to do what she wants and in turn hurt others in the process. ultimately you and your mate falling out big time.
deciding what you really want in all of this is key as it seems you are the one being edged out here.
good luck

 

[ono]

I'm going to ride this out until 21st November.

We'll have been together for 2 years then, if we were still together. The thing is, we have split up, but aside from that, nothing has changed. We still go out, text, see each other on a night, have sex, watch City etc.

So in that respect, even though we're not technically together, she knows what would happen if she strayed and i know what she'd do if i did the same thing, even though it technically wouldn't be cheating.

My mate knows the deal. I'm 100% sure he isn't even attemtping to nob her. I was more bothered about how it looks, and from this thread i can figure out it looks and sounds a whole lot worse than it actually is.

We've talked about getting back together, but she wants to wait until the 21st November. She's a girl, girls are weird like that. This girl is even weirder than most in that way.

So yeah, 21st November and if there's nothing doing after that, then i'll probably take Dave's advice and run for the hills. Well, jog.

the mere fact you have brought this to the forum shows an element of mistrust.
there is only one way this can go i'm afraid.
you have already said you have "split up" so there is no cheating but you feel it would, too covienient for her to do what she wants and in turn hurt others in the process. ultimately you and your mate falling out big time.
deciding what you really want in all of this is key as it seems you are the one being edged out here.
good luck

It wasn't so much mistrust that made me feel the need to post this. I just needed someone elses perspective on it.

 

[Didsbury Dave]

I'm going to ride this out until 21st November.

We'll have been together for 2 years then, if we were still together. The thing is, we have split up, but aside from that, nothing has changed. We still go out, text, see each other on a night, have sex, watch City etc.

So in that respect, even though we're not technically together, she knows what would happen if she strayed and i know what she'd do if i did the same thing, even though it technically wouldn't be cheating.

My mate knows the deal. I'm 100% sure he isn't even attemtping to nob her. I was more bothered about how it looks, and from this thread i can figure out it looks and sounds a whole lot worse than it actually is.

We've talked about getting back together, but she wants to wait until the 21st November. She's a girl, girls are weird like that. This girl is even weirder than most in that way.

So yeah, 21st November and if there's nothing doing after that, then i'll probably take Dave's advice and run for the hills. Well, jog.

You haven't spilit up.

Your relationship continues but she can now see other people, as she is doing.

She's doing pretty well out of this.

You're following her like a lapdog on the off-chance she "decides" you can be her number one. Probably depends on who she gets on with your mate, to be honest. Or whether someone else comes along.

I'm sorry to be brutal, ono.

All relationships have a balance of power. In this one she holds all the cards. She is using that to make you do her bidding.

If you love her then walk away and tell her either she's your girlfriend or not. But I'm sure you're afraid that she'll let you go if you do that. She probably will in reality but than means the relationship was never going to work. Belive me, if you love someone properly you won't risk them walking away.

At the moment you are playing right into her hands. Wake up and smell the coffee. "i'll decide if I want you on the 21st November?" I'd tell her to fuck off because that's pathetic, arrogant and assumptive.

Girls aren't wierd. This one is playing you like a lapdog and you're falling for it.

 

[mcfcliam]

Girls are an absolute waste of time.

 

[tonea2003]

the mere fact you have brought this to the forum shows an element of mistrust.
there is only one way this can go i'm afraid.
you have already said you have "split up" so there is no cheating but you feel it would, too covienient for her to do what she wants and in turn hurt others in the process. ultimately you and your mate falling out big time.
deciding what you really want in all of this is key as it seems you are the one being edged out here.
good luck

It wasn't so much mistrust that made me feel the need to post this. I just needed someone elses perspective on it.

you need to read didsbury daves "brutal" reply, i was trying to say similar in a softer way but his straight to the point reply nails it.
harsh but true.

 

[ono]

I'm going to ride this out until 21st November.

We'll have been together for 2 years then, if we were still together. The thing is, we have split up, but aside from that, nothing has changed. We still go out, text, see each other on a night, have sex, watch City etc.

So in that respect, even though we're not technically together, she knows what would happen if she strayed and i know what she'd do if i did the same thing, even though it technically wouldn't be cheating.

My mate knows the deal. I'm 100% sure he isn't even attemtping to nob her. I was more bothered about how it looks, and from this thread i can figure out it looks and sounds a whole lot worse than it actually is.

We've talked about getting back together, but she wants to wait until the 21st November. She's a girl, girls are weird like that. This girl is even weirder than most in that way.

So yeah, 21st November and if there's nothing doing after that, then i'll probably take Dave's advice and run for the hills. Well, jog.

You haven't spilit up.

Your relationship continues but she can now see other people, as she is doing.

She's doing pretty well out of this.

You're following her like a lapdog on the off-chance she "decides" you can be her number one. Probably depends on who she gets on with your mate, to be honest. Or whether someone else comes along.

I'm sorry to be brutal, ono.

All relationships have a balance of power. In this one she holds all the cards. She is using that to make you do her bidding.

If you love her then walk away and tell her either she's your girlfriend or not. But I'm sure you're afraid that she'll let you go if you do that. She probably will in reality but than means the relationship was never going to work. Belive me, if you love someone properly you won't risk them walking away.

At the moment you are playing right into her hands. Wake up and smell the coffee. "i'll decide if I want you on the 21st November?" I'd tell her to fuck off because that's pathetic, arrogant and assumptive.

Girls aren't wierd. This one is playing you like a lapdog and you're falling for it.

Dave, thanks for the advice, but it's not quite like that. It's difficult to explain but it's just not. Thanks though.

 

[GStar]

I get the impression you've convinced yourself of 'what its like', when our limited knowledge of the situation, sounds very different.

You're not together, so she's free to do what she wants technically, but you're always there as a fall back when she fancies a meal out, some company, or a good seeing to.

Sounds like the first sign of someone else on the scene and she'll drop you without a thought, despite what she says, because right now, you're serving her needs perfectly.

 

[Dirty Harry]

Tbh Ono, you need to run like the f*ckin wind from ths one in my opinion and experience mate, I pretty much agree with DD and all those who are saying along the same lines.

To her you are :-

Plan B,
The back-up,
Until something better comes along,
A soft touch.

She`s waiting for the bigger and better deal and you`ll do in the meantime, as soon as he comes along she`ll drop you like a sack of sh1t without hesitation I can almost guarantee it mate, salvage some pride and walk away with your dignity, at least she`ll have a little more respect for you then.