Joke thread

[Hertzblue]

A teacher asked her class to come up with a sentence that included the word "Rotterdam".

Johnny put his hand up.

The teacher said, "Yes, Johnny?"

"My sister ate all my sweets. I hope they Rotterdam teeth."

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

 

[Skr1975]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[lefty goldblatt]

View attachment 130445

There'd be no-one on Warrington's buses, then

 

[Lavinda Past]

I'm thinking of selling my racing Geese. I just don't have the time anymore…

If you're interested let me know if you'd like a quick gander.

 

[Lavinda Past]

I ran into an old friend yesterday and he gave me some great advice.

"Watch where you're going when you're running you idiot!"

 

[Lavinda Past]

A woman with a big vagina is lying back at the gynaecologists.

She says "Please do not make any jokes about the size of my fanny I've heard them all before"

After not getting any response she repeats her request about no jokes regarding the size of her vagina. Again nothing so she shouts out "no jokes about my large vagina"

After a short delay, a muffled voice says “Sorry, I’m just the scaffolder love, the doctor will be along as soon as I've made the site safe”

 

[Lavinda Past]

A teacher asks the kids in her class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Little Johnny says: "I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the
most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while banging her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."

The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson. "And how about you, Sarah?"

"I wanna be Johnny’s whore."