Joke thread

Ten priests are killed in a coach accident.
They reach the pearly gates and are greeted by the archangel gabriel
"all those who have been involved in fucking boys, take the down escalator".
Nine priests turn around and start their descent,
"oi" shouts gabriel. "take this deaf **** with you".
 
its now a yellow card offence to pass the ball to andy carrol ,
its classed as time wasting by referees
 
I was chatting to a bird in a club.She whispered, "Do you fancy coming back to mine, I've got a fanny the size of a Polo."I said, "Oh yes."When we got back to her place I pulled down her knickers and gasped.She said, "Surprised?"I said, "Totally,
I thought you meant the mint not the fucking hatchback.. !!
 
Wife - "Can I drive?"
Husband - "No. I'm fine"
Wife - "Oh, please let me. I really want to!"
Husband - "No"
Wife - "I tell you what, if you let me drive, just for a bit, when we get home I'll give you a blowjob"
Husband - "Really?"
Wife - "Promise"
Husband - "Oh go on then"..."
And that, your honor, is the final entry from the black box
on the Costa Concordia".
 
leruzin said:
Wife - "Can I drive?"
Husband - "No. I'm fine"
Wife - "Oh, please let me. I really want to!"
Husband - "No"
Wife - "I tell you what, if you let me drive, just for a bit, when we get home I'll give you a blowjob"
Husband - "Really?"
Wife - "Promise"
Husband - "Oh go on then"..."
And that, your honor, is the final entry from the black box
on the Costa Concordia".
Click to expand...

The last page wants it's joke back.
 
On June 3rd the Queen's Golden Jubilee Celebrations are set to climax with over 1000 boats sailing up the River Thames.That`s the most seamen for an 85 year old grandmother since Wayne Rooney went for a massage.
 
shite joke
citykev28 said:
Irish divers who went for a look at the titanic wreckage were amazed to find that after a century, the swimming pools were still full.

Me coats got me name in it.
Click to expand...
 
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