Joke thread

[Keep the Faith]

.

 

[oakiecokie]

I went around to my Grandads to take the dog out for a walk.
As I was about to go out he shouted "Don`t forget poo bags"
"Do I have to" I shouted back.
"Yes" shouted Grandad.
"Alright" I said
"Come on Nana".

 

[MellowJoe]

There's a fine line between genius and insanity, but there is an even finer line between genevenfinerlineius

 

[Stuuuuuu]

There's a fine line between genius and insanity, but there is an even finer line between genevenfinerlineius

Is there a joke in there somewhere?

 

[Indaparkside]

Backed an horse today 1/5 favourite someone in the cowd threw a tin of meat at him which hit directly between the eyes it got beat a shot head, the stewards had an inquirey
as to how it got beat jockey said it got Hampered

 

[KS55]

Is there a joke in there somewhere?

It's an even finer line between genius and.......?

 

[MellowJoe]

Is there a joke in there somewhere?

I'm not sure

 

[malg]

Backed an horse today 1/5 favourite someone in the cowd threw a tin of meat at him which hit directly between the eyes it got beat a shot head, the stewards had an inquirey
as to how it got beat jockey said it got Hampered

Either you've been drinking or you've got Bratwurst fingers......

 

[Well Wisher]

Am I pissed or is everyone else?

 

[dickie davies]

Backed an horse today 1/5 favourite someone in the cowd threw a tin of meat at him which hit directly between the eyes it got beat a shot head, the stewards had an inquirey
as to how it got beat jockey said it got Hampered

What’s funny about a horse being shot?

 

[Bill Walker]

Sent this to my partner last night.
"Hi love, just having one more pint with the lads,"





"If I'm not home in 30 minutes read this text again"

 

[Bill Walker]

My mate Dave had a really bad accident last week.
He’s had both feet amputated and his vocal chords were damaged.
He’s not making a song and dance about it though

 

[Indaparkside]

Either you've been drinking or you've got Bratwurst fingers......

Both

 

[forlorn hope]

 

[yeseye]

During breakfast, my wife said she was leaving me because of my obsession with twitter. I nearly choked on my #brown

 

[balotellishaircut]

My three favourite things in the world are eating my cat and not using commas.

 

[bluebc]

my all time fav comedy clip

 

[forlorn hope]

 

[ysmsa]

The inventor of the potato masher was buried today.

He died 9 months ago but they've only just managed to open the drawer with his body in down at the morgue!

 

[Barcon]

The inventor of the potato masher was buried today.

He died 9 months ago but they've only just managed to open the drawer with his body in down at the morgue!

How come?