Joke thread

What's the difference between a catholic priest and a spot?


At least a spot waits till you're a teenager to cum on your face.
 
Comedian: Hello everyone! I'm a Schizophrenic.
Heckler: Well fuck off then... both of ya.
 
My mate told me that I just don't understand irony.

Which was ironic because we were at a bus stop at the time.
 
A priest and a Hindu are making toast. The priest exclaims "look there is an image of jesus in my margarine!" The Hindu replies " I can't believe its not Budda!
 

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