Stupid little things that bug you

[Man-chester copperpot]

So ladies & gentleman, this news story made me proud to be British.

BBC news “A man caught with extreme animal pornography, including videos depicting sexual acts with a tortoise and a horse, has been handed a six-month suspended sentence”

I’m going to put the Horse to one side and honestly ask what sexual act could you do with a Tortoise?

You could say it’s bugging me and i ain’t googling for answers

At the front you have a little snappy beak and the other end would be tighter than a mouse’s ear. I’m guessing there’s no boobs under that shell.

I havent been this confused for a long time and I don’t want to overthink it……………


…….or was it even a female tortoise?

Just when you think people couldn’t get any more weird

 

[maccieblue]

People who get up in the morning and switch the TV on.
If you need a news fix the radio is better than watching some idiots sat on a couch talking daft shit about celebrities and koala bears.

;)

Or do like me and visit this site to get updated on the important things in life
I've never heard breakfast TV discuss important issues like is it a barm or muffin

 

[Bill Walker]

No queue at the cash point earlier today, just one bloke already taking his money from the machine. As I walk forward, he pulls out another card, gives me a glance and I take a step back. Unbelievably, he does this twice more -4 withdrawals on separate cards.
Obviously he's entitled to do that but, stood there waiting, I'm thinking it that was me, I would have done two then step aside. The bank wasn't busy.

Do people still use, and queue up for, cash ?

(That should wind a few up on here haha)

Seriously though I haven't needed or used cash for at least five years.

 

[idahoblues]

Do people still use, and queue up for, cash ?

(That should wind a few up on here haha)

Seriously though I haven't needed or used cash for at least five years.

Thirty for me

 

[Barcon]

Do people still use, and queue up for, cash ?

(That should wind a few up on here haha)

Seriously though I haven't needed or used cash for at least five years.

I pay “Dan” $25.00 to cut my grass. I had to go to the bank in May and get a load of fivers.
Dan has now fucked off for the season so we went into town and spent all my remaining fivers on beer at the legion.

 

[Shirley]

Betting ads that tell you to bet responsibly…

 

[hallsteve62]

Flash Dust Magnet. Just move your ornaments you scruffy twat!

 

[bennyboy]

I've started a new job on Trafford Park and cycle past the Trafford Centre where there's lovely wide pavements and cycle lanes, yet zombies still walk along the cycle lanes.

Tempted to attach one of these to my handle bars and give em a good honking to move the fuck out of the way.


View attachment 134566

Cyclists on pavements will always be a bigger problem than pedestrians on cycle lanes.

 

[Fiftyyearsandcounting]

Do people still use, and queue up for, cash ?

(That should wind a few up on here haha)

Seriously though I haven't needed or used cash for at least five years.

Local Barber "Cash Only", Chippy "Cash Only", Dry Cleaners "Cash Only", Window Cleaner "Cash Only", Car Mechanic "Cash Only". Village Shop "Cash Only". Seems small business are switching to avoid increasing merchant fees.

Footnote: Local Co-Op does accept cards, but on Wednesday their system was down!

 

[heslops barnet]

Local Barber "Cash Only", Chippy "Cash Only", Dry Cleaners "Cash Only", Window Cleaner "Cash Only", Car Mechanic "Cash Only". Village Shop "Cash Only". Seems small business are switching to avoid increasing merchant fees.

Footnote: Local Co-Op does accept cards, but on Wednesday their system was down!

Or money laundering and the like?