Alcohol, hints, tips, advice etc.

Booze is the last thing you need when you've got other problems. You can never drown your sorrows; they always float back up and have then to be dealt with during a hangover! Help is what you need and there's plenty out there and in here. PMs are very helpful. We are here for you, Mate.
 
As others have said, well done for taking that first step and admitting that you have a problem. Only advice I can really offer is to talk to your doctor. All the best mate.
 
We're away until Wednesday but I'll start again at Day 0 today. Had two pints with dinner last night and the waiter brought out two Baileys at the end of dinner, which I would never have gone for even in the heyday. The mrs isn't drinking at the moment so I had them both, needless to say I'm not feeling quite right today. Physically I feel fine, it wasn't enough for a hangover but I'm mildly on edge mentally. I'll stop whilst I'm somewhat ahead.
 
Thank you everyone.
On the outside everything is well, I'm holding my job down which pays incredible wages I have a loving wife amd a beautiful little girl but I am absolutely destroying it all, devestated my wife today with my admission. Was a big step today to admit my issue, if I'm honest I don't know what happens from here, just threw all the alcohol in the house away. I want to be a better person, I want to be me from 4 years ago and I think drinking let's me pretend I am, it's like I miss myself and I want me back.
I'm sorry everyone I'm just lost at the moment
 
aguero93:20 said:
I'm not religious mate, but I've found AA to be a great help the last few years. If nothing else it'll put you in touch with people in the same boat as yourself who can relate to what you're going through. You've gone part of the way to taking the first step already so well done there and always feel free to send me a message if you want someone to talk to.
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Agreed. My mum is an atheist but she went to AA meetings and they did help. Although they’re not for everyone.
 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
Thank you everyone.
On the outside everything is well, I'm holding my job down which pays incredible wages I have a loving wife amd a beautiful little girl but I am absolutely destroying it all, devestated my wife today with my admission. Was a big step today to admit my issue, if I'm honest I don't know what happens from here, just threw all the alcohol in the house away. I want to be a better person, I want to be me from 4 years ago and I think drinking let's me pretend I am, it's like I miss myself and I want me back.
I'm sorry everyone I'm just lost at the moment
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What you been drinking? If it is vast amounts going teetotal off the rip can be dangerous better to buy some weak cans of lager and wean yourself off.
 
Scottyboi said:
What you been drinking? If it is vast amounts going teetotal off the rip can be dangerous better to buy some weak cans of lager and wean yourself off.
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Well I don't drink during the day but a night time will consist of about 5 pints and then probably measured half a litre of spirit. No enjoyment in the taste just the buzz which incidently is getting harder and harder to get to
 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
Well I don't drink during the day but a night time will consist of about 5 pints and then probably measured half a litre of spirit. No enjoyment in the taste just the buzz which incidently is getting harder and harder to get to
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Yeah I'd say that is enough to mean you need to wean off, when my elder brother went to his GP about his drinking he was having 2 bottles of red and 4 cans of strongbow a night, and they came up with a plan for his to wean off using weaker lager.

Should be plenty of information about it online too good luck mate.

This is a good listen if you have time, the science of what it actually does to your body and brain.

 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
Thank you everyone.
On the outside everything is well, I'm holding my job down which pays incredible wages I have a loving wife amd a beautiful little girl but I am absolutely destroying it all, devestated my wife today with my admission. Was a big step today to admit my issue, if I'm honest I don't know what happens from here, just threw all the alcohol in the house away. I want to be a better person, I want to be me from 4 years ago and I think drinking let's me pretend I am, it's like I miss myself and I want me back.
I'm sorry everyone I'm just lost at the moment
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Hi, like the others have said, admitting that you have a problem is the first step, but reading through your posts, it seems that the trauma of losing your Mum was the trigger for this, and you've used the booze as a crutch. I think you could do with some grief counselling, because this will allow you to face the one thing that you are trying to blot out. You've pushed it to one side and tried to bury it with the drinking. I think it would be really beneficial for you to come to terms with your grief and take it from there.

Good luck
 
You’ve already made the first step to getting better mate. Just remember it won’t happen over night and it’s a progressive journey step by step until you reach your destination, so don’t panic if you don’t feel all is well within a few weeks or months. Just focus on the progress.
 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
So. Many people know me on here and judging by the amount of new users many don't.
I have gone from the young lad that gets smashed Friday to Sunday to the grown up that has a few drinks after work.
Unfortunately in the last 3 years and if I'm honest since my mum passed away my drinking has become unstoppable. I will drink to excess 5 or 6 nights a week it doesn't matter what I'm doing or what is happening I cannot stop until I'm absolutely hammered, i pretend im okay by going to bed early 1 night without a drink. I need help but AA is all about finding God which I'm absolutely not interested in.
I'm not an alcoholic but I'm on the brink amd I don't know what to do
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Hi matey, well done admitting you have a problem, that's step 1.
I've finally gave up drinking after 20 years of drinking 8 to 9 pints every night.
When I say gave up I mean I'm 7 weeks sober.
I tried weaning myself off it but failed miserably so I made the decision to just quit.
I spoke to a reformed alcoholic who gave me the following advice, when I was failing.
1 Give up
2 Set achievable goals, more like false promises.
Promise yourself a drink in an hour or next the day, then move the goal posts and start the cycle again.

I Use non alcoholic beer when cravings are strongest. I can tell you the good ones

Don't feel you are on your own, your not.

Good luck
 
Hi Pal - well done for accepting you have a problem. I have friends who have been successful via AA and some who haven't. My suggestion is your Doctor first who may refer you for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) or counselling which maybe beneficial.
 
AA Can be good for some people and is not necessarily about finding God. The pedantic 12 step approach works for some but not others I guess. Regardless of what road you go down, getting the right support for you personally is what is most important. I volunteered in substance misuse and some found 1-1 sessions much easier, others preferred team groups.
Most of all I believe you have to be honest and open during the process. If you lapse own it and discuss why it may have happened. Don't beat yourself up about it, happens to most people. Be realistic about the goals you want to achieve and good luck
 
N1985 said:
Amazing work right there buddy. Great little milestone that.

Had a break from here for a while and the Internet in general. Great to see this thread doing well and people getting after it! It's a great life being clean and sober. Challenging, but life is.

Tomorrow I'll be 1700 days clean and sober. If I can do it, anybody can. One day at a time guys and gals. One day at a time.
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What a brilliant achievement! Well done. I'm a couple of years behind you but full of motivation and good intention.
And you're right, being sober doesn't make life any easier but sometimes facing the challenge is much more rewarding than hiding from them from behind a bottle.
 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
Hi mate, really is long time no see.

I been on anti depressants when my mum passed as she chose 3 days before lock down so i got it all in one go, didnt even know it was happening until my wife sat me down and said you dont talk or laugh anymore talk to me!
Came off In August after 2 years.
Doctor my be a good first call. I'm embarrassed
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i don't have a drink problem in fact i hardly drink, i did however feel very down in the dumps, im one of those blokes that says pull yourself together you soft ****( to myself),but i just couldn't get over my depression, i plucked up the courage to see the doctor (because i was embarrassed as well), it was a locum ,never met her in my life and as i started talking i cried like a baby, i walked out the doctors with the weight of the world taken off, because i spoke about it, i was prescribed drugs,but just talking did the job for me , all sorts of shit came out that i hadn't even thought about,nowadays if someone i know is having a hard time i dont call them soft cunts anymore ,i tell them what i went through and hopefully that helps them get help, good luck mate
 
Nebuchadnezzar said:
We're away until Wednesday but I'll start again at Day 0 today. Had two pints with dinner last night and the waiter brought out two Baileys at the end of dinner, which I would never have gone for even in the heyday. The mrs isn't drinking at the moment so I had them both, needless to say I'm not feeling quite right today. Physically I feel fine, it wasn't enough for a hangover but I'm mildly on edge mentally. I'll stop whilst I'm somewhat ahead.
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You are allowed a wobble, it’s how you beat the ten count and get up from your knees that counts
 
Nebuchadnezzar said:
We're away until Wednesday but I'll start again at Day 0 today. Had two pints with dinner last night and the waiter brought out two Baileys at the end of dinner, which I would never have gone for even in the heyday. The mrs isn't drinking at the moment so I had them both, needless to say I'm not feeling quite right today. Physically I feel fine, it wasn't enough for a hangover but I'm mildly on edge mentally. I'll stop whilst I'm somewhat ahead.
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It's really positive that you've identified the physical and mental impact that a few days drinking has had on you.
Sometimes a bit of an experiment with drinking can be a powerful tool in assessing the relationship with alcohol and figuring out where you want to go next.
Consider it a learning opportunity and use it for the future.
 
BoyBlue_1985 said:
So. Many people know me on here and judging by the amount of new users many don't.
I have gone from the young lad that gets smashed Friday to Sunday to the grown up that has a few drinks after work.
Unfortunately in the last 3 years and if I'm honest since my mum passed away my drinking has become unstoppable. I will drink to excess 5 or 6 nights a week it doesn't matter what I'm doing or what is happening I cannot stop until I'm absolutely hammered, i pretend im okay by going to bed early 1 night without a drink. I need help but AA is all about finding God which I'm absolutely not interested in.
I'm not an alcoholic but I'm on the brink amd I don't know what to do
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The three biggest words for anyone alcohol issues…
 
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