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Drunken Sleep Pissing - We've all done it, haven't we?
- Thread starter Didsbury Dave
- Start date
Rammy Blue
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 23 May 2008
- Messages
- 30,357
although done it myself a few times got to say the funniest one i have ever seen didn't involve me.....thankfully.
was at a wedding when i was in my mid-20's, big posh do in a huge marquee; later on in the evening when everyone is well oiled a bloke had fallen asleep with his head slumped on a table next to us.
Suddenly said bloke stands up, does all the motions of opening an imaginary door, lifting up an imaginary toilet seat, unzips himself and proceeds to do a piss right in the middle of the marquee in front of all present, flushes the imaginary toilet, zips himself up, sits back down and slumps back on table fast asleep.
absolute legend.
was at a wedding when i was in my mid-20's, big posh do in a huge marquee; later on in the evening when everyone is well oiled a bloke had fallen asleep with his head slumped on a table next to us.
Suddenly said bloke stands up, does all the motions of opening an imaginary door, lifting up an imaginary toilet seat, unzips himself and proceeds to do a piss right in the middle of the marquee in front of all present, flushes the imaginary toilet, zips himself up, sits back down and slumps back on table fast asleep.
absolute legend.
feedthegoat
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Jan 2006
- Messages
- 857
No they aren't Chaz that was Wolfies ex Julie. She wasn't amused the next time she came in the local with Wolfie when someone put a bog roll on their table in case John was desperate.charliebigspuds said:one of my mate's was staying at his bird's parent's house whilst her parent's were away. He came home pissed one night and fell asleep on the couch, halfway through the night he got up and had a shite behind the living room door. He didnt even know he'd done it until he was awoken by his screaming girlfriend who had scraped it across the carpet whilst opening the door to get in the room!! it was found out later in the day that he'd also wiped his arse on the curtain's. Remarkably they are married now.
2bluegp
Well-Known Member
done the phantom pissing a few times, over the telly, in a drawer full of a mates clothes on the first night of weekend scooter rally- that went down well!
the most public one though was getting woken up by my wife as i was pissing out of the front room window, the windows were 10 ft high box sash windows so i was could be seen full lenth, bollock naked pissing through onto the window sill. not too bad, but i lived on eastbourne sea front at the time.
that didnt go down to well either.
ctid, rob
the most public one though was getting woken up by my wife as i was pissing out of the front room window, the windows were 10 ft high box sash windows so i was could be seen full lenth, bollock naked pissing through onto the window sill. not too bad, but i lived on eastbourne sea front at the time.
that didnt go down to well either.
ctid, rob
lostmyhouseski
Well-Known Member
and how about sharting gentlemen?
jimharri
Moderator
What's that then? The dreaded follow through, I presume. Very nasty. Er, so a friend tells me!lostmyhouseski said:and how about sharting gentlemen?
*heads for cabin in the hills*
poh
Well-Known Member
Did it in the bath once,'no problem with that' i hear you say,but the thing was we had a party that night and people stayed over,and you guessed it,my mate was sleeping in the bath ! got the fucker on the face as well !
Daves boy Saul
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 6 Jun 2008
- Messages
- 116
Dave, from a fellow Dave i've many to mention. Your correct though, its 'mans' way of not sleeping in piss, call it natural selection. I do when i piss where i should'nt.
ConnorMCFC
Well-Known Member
i did! but i walked into my mums room, bollock naked, and pissed in there wardrobe! oh i can tell you i have never lived it down!
bluemonday
Well-Known Member
I stayed at an ex-girlfriends parents house one night. Got f*cking slaughtered, and next morning I was the last to get up.
Went for a shite, which was theeee biggest shit I have ever done. The sheer length and width of the stool shocked me.
It was like a proper tramps shit. Anyway, I just knew I couldn't flush it and there was no bog-brush to force it down.
So I opened the bathroom window, picked up the huge shit with my bare hands and threw it as far as I could. Job done.
Had a shower and went down for breakfast, to be met with stone-cold silence and hateful glares. The mum, dad and my bird were sat in the conservatory finishing their full-english as my enormous turd splattered the glass roof.
We never went out again.
Went for a shite, which was theeee biggest shit I have ever done. The sheer length and width of the stool shocked me.
It was like a proper tramps shit. Anyway, I just knew I couldn't flush it and there was no bog-brush to force it down.
So I opened the bathroom window, picked up the huge shit with my bare hands and threw it as far as I could. Job done.
Had a shower and went down for breakfast, to be met with stone-cold silence and hateful glares. The mum, dad and my bird were sat in the conservatory finishing their full-english as my enormous turd splattered the glass roof.
We never went out again.